What the Hell is Wrong With You People?

NOTE: Pop Culture Boner has a new home and a new podcast. You can listen here, if that’s your jam. 

Normally, I don’t bother paying attention to Miss America. I’m not American… actually, I don’t pay attention to the Australian incarnation either. I just don’t really have an interest in beauty pageants or their contestants. It’s cool if you do. It’s not really my bag. But, being a person with eyes, I couldn’t help but notice the controversy surrounding the crowning of Nina Davuluri as Miss America 2013. To which I say: JESUS FUCK!! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE? For those of you who may not have seen, Miss America looks like this:


Looking at her, she has all of the credentials of a beauty queen: Great face. Great smile. Great hair. Gravity defying bust. (How? HOW?) Studying medicine. Gives good diplomatic answers to inane questions about the role of the Miss America. That’s all you need right? According to a bunch of idiots on Twitter, no.

Since the story blew up most of the racist Twitter accouts have been deleted. Lucky for you guys, it’s the internet, so nothing ever really goes away. Here’s a few that I could actually drag up images for:

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On top of that, there were a bunch of posts about how she was obviously a Muslim terrorist and how Obama must be pleased. My favourite, just for its sheer stupidity, comes from this account which has since been deleted: @wnfraser “@ABC2020 nice slap in the face to the people of 9-11 how pathetic #missamerica“. To summarise, the bigots were angry because Miss American has brown skin. However, they couldn’t decide which country that meant she was from, so most of them just took a shot in the dark.

This whole thing made me mad. Really mad. So, before I explode into a cloud of rage and glitter, some dot points:

  1. Yes. You’re absolutely right. You do have to be American to win. Which is why an American, Nina Davuluri, from New York, won Miss America.
  2. “American” does not automatically imply “white”, you fucksticks.
  3. Nina Davuluri is of Indian descent. She is not Indonesian, Egyptian, Arab, or whatever else you took it upon yourself to assign to her using your limited understanding of geography and vague knowledge of places where people have different skin tones. Invest in an globe. I’m not going to take you any more seriously, but you should do it anyway.
  4. Even if Nina Davuluri was an Arab person, that would not some how make her magically responsible for 9/11, you shitbags. The leap of logic that it takes for you to get to the point where you’d be willing to blame a hypothetical Arab beauty queen for a large scale terrorist attack just boggles the mind. Like…how? How did you get there? What twist did your brain take that you would think that was OK?
  5. The hashtag “#wherethewhitewomenat” is the stupidest fucking thing I’ve ever seen. Did you look at the rest of the competition? It’s like 97% white women. The standard for American beauty (or any kind of beauty) should not automatically be “blonde haired, blue eyed, white girl”. The white women are literally all over the contest. And they were beaten fair and square by someone of Indian descent. Fucking deal with it.

I’m too tired and irritated to continue this post. Like, I really just feel like it shouldn’t even be an issue. She’s beautiful and she won a beauty pageant. It shouldn’t be that hard to comprehend. Fuck.

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