Last night was date night. Of course, by ‘date night’ I do not mean an actual date (ridiculous) but dinner and a movie with my housemate who I am unintentionally platonically married to (it’s complicated). Anyway, we made the executive decision to go and see Seven Psychopaths. partially because we both love In Bruges, which was also written by Martin McDonagh, but mostly because aforementioned housemate has an intense love of Christopher Walken. Don’t we all, though?
It’s been a while since I’ve done a movie review and even longer since I’ve talked about anything that I actually liked, so I figured I would ensure that you all go and see this film by giving you seven reasons that you should definitely go and see Seven Psychopaths. Plus, the title for this one pretty much wrote itself, and who am I to pass that up? Without further ado:
- Remind yourself that Colin Farrell actually goes alright. Colin Farrell makes some questionable career choices. And also some questionable hat choices.
In the face of overwhelmingly bad things, like the remake of Total Recall and Alexander, you tend to forget that he can actually act. The film is very darkly funny, and Farrell himself has an excellent sense of comedic timing. So, if you need to remember why, at some point, you thought you liked Colin Farrell but want something a little more understated than Horrible Bosses (which he is also very good in) then go see this. Then go and rent In Bruges.
- Excellent goddamn dialogue. Martin McDonagh deserves all the awards. All of them. Because this script is hilarious and peppered with some seriously unforgettable one-liners. If nothing else, go see it so that you can see Christopher Walken refuse a drink by saying, “No, I take peyote.” Which brings me to my next point…
- Christopher Flipping Walken.The internet loves Christopher Walken. We all love Chrisopher Walken. With good reason too. Generally he just kind of looks like a sweet old man, but because he has such an odd way of speaking he’s always cast as these really vicious or menancing characters. This role is a nice combination of sweet old man and outright weirdo, which is nice becuase it gives Walken more of a chance to show off his comedic chops and also just cruise around being the rad old dude he is.
- Weirdly self-aware script. If you’ve been reading this blog for any length of time, you’ll know that I love me some meta script writing, especially when it’s done really well. This is a a particularly good example because essentially it’s a film about writing. Marty (Farrell) is an alcoholic Irish writer struggling to finish a screenplay. He ends up unintentionally enlisting the help of Billy (played by Sam Rockwell) and Hans (Walken) and they go through the writing process in the most roundabout and vaguely violent way possible. (I realise it’s probably a little late in the piece to be giving you a run down of the plot, but it’s my blog. I’ll do what I wanna.) While going through the process the supporting characters provide often hilarious commentary on Marty’s progressing script. It’s like a less pretentious version of that Charlie Kauffman/ Nicholas Cage thing, Adaptation, that they force all first and second year Arts students to watch on loop before they graduate.
- Excellent supporting cast featuring a sassy Shih Tzu. The supporting cast for this is so good: Woody Harrelson, Abbie Cornish, Olga Kurylenko (the Bond girl from Quantum of Solace, in case you were wondering), Tom Waits. They’re all phenomenal. Also, there is just the sassiest Shih Tzu you will ever see on film. I don’t think I’ve ever seen an animal be so ridiculous looking in theory and so noble on film.
This is the animal in question on the red carpet at the event. Not a word of a lie. Look at it. It has a little bow and everything. So ridiculous. But with such noble posture.
- Tom Waits has a bunny rabbit. I really, REALLY like Tom Waits, so this line of reasoning is probably more of a draw card for me than it is for you, but Tom Waits is a psycho with a bunny rabbit.
His story arc is really good and he’s such a strange guy anyway that he makes a wonderful nutcase. And he has a bunny rabbit. And I’m still into it in spite of the fact that he has very visibly aged. Chalk that one up to “things you didn’t really need to know about me.”
- It’s not Twilight. The final installment of the Twilight saga came out recently. This is not it. This is better. Do yourself a favour and go see this. It’s better written. It’s funnier. The cast is better. Just…go.
Well, that was sillier than initially anticipated. I had intended this to be a serious list of reasons this film was brilliant. Instead, it’s a bit ridiculous. But seriously, go see this film. The cast is amazing, it’s funny as all hell, Colin Farrell’s eyebrows are only slighly off-putting. Do yourself a favour.