Frankie and the Foot Fetish

Ever wonder what Frankie Muniz is doing nowadays? No? Me either. Forgotten who Frankie Muniz is? That’s reasonable. Here’s a picture:

All child actors have to master the art of looking vaguely surprised in promotional photos.

He was Malcolm in Malcolm in the Middle, which I remember as being brilliant. I could be wrong though. It’s been a while. It had a great theme tune. That always helps. Anyway, like most child actors he kind of dropped off the radar there for a while. Apparently in the years following the show’s wrap-up he’s been racing cars for Jensen Motorsports and drumming in a band called Kingsfoil. Also, he now looks like this:

Like a terrifying man-baby.

Sounds fairly harmless, no? Considering ‘child star’ stories are usually full of drug binges, DUI arrests and nude photo scandals, it’s probably a good thing that he’s  managed to keep such a low profile. However, he did decide to direct Kingsfoil’s latest film clip and I think it reveals a little more about him than he originally intended. Don’t worry. He only appears in the video for about 3 seconds, so I’m not about to call him out on an embarrassingly large ego. Just have a look and see if you notice… something.

So, aside from some very earnest staring into the camera and a couple of weird attempts at artistic statement through the medium of fire-and-water throwing/ sped up emotional gesticulating at the side of a woman’s face, did anyone else notice the amount of time that the camera spent focussing on feet? Because there are a lot of feet in this video. In the space of a 4 minute song, there are no less than 13 separate shots of feet, shoes or feet in shoes. That may not seem like a lot, but each shot lingers for an uncomfortably long time and in a 4 minute video it adds up to about 30 seconds worth of foot-related material… which I just feel is unnecessary.

Just a sample of feet.

What’s really unnerving is that they’re just so disconnected from every other shot that happens. You’ll be watching some people standing having a drink and then suddenly! Barefoot jumping! Naturally, the conclusion that I have drawn from this is that, whilst he didn’t have some sort of teenage meltdown as a result of a childhood spent in the spotlight as a cast member on a popular TV show, Frankie Muniz did develop a foot fetish and it’s made an unsavoury appearance in his video clip. Clearly, that’s the only logical explanation. That, or he’s made the mistake of every aspiring artsy music video director and assumed that disconnected shots of body parts make a piece more interesting. Pro tip for any aspiring arsty music video directors: disconnected shots of body parts make nothing interesting. At all.

Also, did anyone else notice that none of the party goers in this video look at all like they’re having a good time?

Maybe Frankie’s potential foot fetish was getting in the way of the party. Or maybe it’s just really hard to look like you’re having the best time ever drinking and moshing to a song that barely warrants more than a sort of exaggerated sway.

Kingsfoil’s single, What Your Mother Taught You, is available on iTunes now, if you’re into that whole melodic rock thing. Alternatively, you could really do yourself a favour and instead download the Malcolm in the Middle theme tune and relive the early 00s. That’s what I’m doing.


3 thoughts on “Frankie and the Foot Fetish

  1. I feel I must say that this song COULD have been really good. What with its ridiculously easy and catchy chorus….why did they make it so damn boring!
    Two more things 1. Notice Frankie is an open handed drummer? I think anyway. From the disjointed shots I saw(I didn’t watch it all, I got REALLY bored). Cool shit bro.
    And 2. Apart from my intense fear of feet….their lead sick German creeps me out. A lot. His features don’t fit on his face….

  2. Did anyone else notice apart from the feet shots there were multiple shots of the lead singers crotch and some of the guitarists’?

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